How Do You Turn off the Water in Your House

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If you absolutely cannot find the valve and water is spraying like a Trumpet of Doom, call your neighbor. They probably know where the city shut-off is for your whole street. It’s a civic duty, like helping someone move, but wetter.

As a last resort, call the water company. They can shut off your water from the street—but that might take an hour, and your floorboards will be a memory by then. So know your valve.

One more surprising fact: In ancient Rome, they didn’t have shut-off valves. When a pipe burst, they just sacrificed a goat to the water gods. Your valve is cheaper and less messy. Use it.

So go now. Find that valve. Give it a practice twist. Your future self—standing in a dry kitchen, sipping coffee—will hug you. Probably.